My Hospital Birth
The birth story of our daughter. We birthed at a hospital in Miami and prepared with HypnoBirthing.
I always heard stories of how when you become pregnant there’s this sudden shift and a certain kind of sisterhood emerges. I imagined it would be empowering and motivational. It took me by surprise when it was the complete opposite! Women stopped me in the grocery store with looks of pity - their eyes said you poor woman. They told me (unsolicited) how traumatic and unpleasant their pregnancy experiences were - so much discomfort, swelling, pain, stitches. What a joy to hear! When I told people that I intended to have a birth with no medicine, I was met with shock and disbelief.
Most of the women I engaged with had such a negative disposition on pregnancy, it saddened me. I also felt like an outcast because honestly I loved being pregnant. Even through the all-day sickness, aversions to foods and certain smells, gagging on toothpaste, I enjoyed the journey. I almost felt bad telling everyone how great I felt because people expected me to be slightly miserable at all times!
In society pregnancy is portrayed as an inconvenience. We are constantly bombarded by ads and movies with pregnant women wobbling around, holding their backs complaining, screaming and sweating in the delivery room. So naturally we consume these images and when it’s our turn we play out these roles because that’s what we’re programmed with. We automatically associate pain and discomfort with childbirth.
Our bodies were designed to do this. Women have been birthing without medication for centuries, and as I was met with skepticism I wondered how we lost trust in our innate ability to birth freely. I don’t judge anyone who prefers to have medication or a scheduled c-section instead, sometimes it’s medically necessary. I believe in keeping mothers and babies healthy and safe. What I do fault is the lack of information and resources provided to women by medical professionals because most don’t know that they have a CHOICE or say in the process.
It was really important to me to have the baby naturally without any medication because I wanted to minimize her exposure to unnecessary trauma and medications which can pass through the placenta and onto the baby. Medications can also slow down the labor process because they work against your muscle’s natural reflexes. Research shows that women who have a natural childbirth have a lower risk of postpartum depression, faster recovery, and the babies are typically calmer and breastfeed more easily.
I had tons of anxiety and fear surrounding my labor and all the positivity in the world couldn’t hinder that small voice in the back of my head questioning, “how the hell are you going to do this?!”
Then one day, one of my best friends who is a God send, sent me an Instagram video on HypnoBirthing. I had never heard of it but was instantly drawn to it.
HypnoBirthing combines deep meditation and relaxation with breathing techniques and provides spiritual and real world advice to empower you through your birthing day.
Not only did it dismantle all of the false beliefs and conditioning I had surrounding childbirth but it reminded me of the power and purpose I possess as a woman.
The course encourages and inspires you to be your own advocate and to take back the power and control that the modern day patriarchy has stripped from us.
Doctors and hospitals treat giving birth like a medical condition. We’ve lost the spiritual connection and we discount the great gift that birthing a human truly is. We think women give birth each day, anyone can do it, and downplay the process.
From my perspective, to be successful in HypnoBirthing you have to really practice your relaxation cues and focus on inwardly connecting with your body.
Much like my early preparation for labor, HypnoBirthing was all about shifting perception and mindset, replacing negative associations with positive ones such as contractions/surges, pain/pressure, water breaking/membranes releasing. In addition to learning the relaxation and breathing techniques, you are educated on how to prepare your body for labor, the labor process, and how to identify the phases of labor once the time comes.
My baby came a week before her due date. From start to finish my labor was about 8 hours, with less than 45 minutes of working the baby down the birth canal (pushing). I felt no pain, just pressure like I prepared for.
My husband was an all-star, I really could not have made it through without him. As soon as the contractions started he was up and ready to provide the support he had been training for. As encouraged in the course, we stayed home for the majority of the active labor phase until the contractions were much closer apart. When we reached the hospital I was 6cm dilated (ideal time to get to the hospital as it is closer to delivery and minimizes medical intervention).
In the birthing room my husband got the diffuser going with lavender essential oil and from there it was just connecting to my body and the baby while focusing on relaxing my muscles to allow my body to take over and do what it does best. He massaged my back as needed and continued reciting birthing affirmations throughout. I will admit, through some of the more intense surges I lost my concentration but I just kept breathing and trusting the process.
Having a birth ball definitely helps too to take pressure off of your back and joints.
My doctor was a saint, I’ve been going to her since I was in high school and she truly honored all of our wishes. The nurses were great too. Lighting was soft and minimal during the experience, I wasn’t hooked up to unnecessary medical equipment so I was free to move, everyone spoke in soft tones, and most importantly no one yelled at me to push, they just encouraged me and told me how great I was doing.
A few surges and a couple of pushes later I held my baby girl in my arms in shock and complete disbelief. Ten months and she was finally here. I yelled out “I did it!” A few minutes later I was up and walking around.
Our bodies are amazing. They are capable of creating, sustaining and nourishing a life. I didn’t want to let anyone take my strength, my power, that important moment that I couldn’t get back, away from me.
To learn more about HypnoBirthing, and to sign up for a class, click here.
